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In the not-so-distant past, I used to struggle with sleep issues and insomnia. I would go to bed, and then toss-and-turn for what felt like hours. I’d peek at the clock and groan when I realised I had to be up in 5 hours. I’d toss and turn some more, then I’d look at the clock again. Up in 3 hours.
Finally I would drift into an uncertain sleep, only to be destroyed by the sound of my alarm going off. I would hit snooze until the last possible moment and then drag myself out of bed.
“I’m just not a morning person”, I said. “I’m a night owl. That’s a thing.”
And it is a thing. I am a night owl. However, I also have a job that requires me to get up early and a life that I want to enjoy. I set myself the task of improving my sleep, and after a lot of trial-and-error I managed to sort myself out.
Sleep is one of the the areas I consider fundamental to living a happy life. Lack of sleep affects everything from your weight to your productivity to your mood to your immune system.
My sleep is still not perfect. If I drink too much coffee, or let my routine get disrupted for too many days in a row, I will start to sleep badly. Then I’ll have to patiently re-set my sleeping patterns. The difference now is that I am in control. If I want a good nights sleep, I know how to get it.
So, what did I do?
Fix your sleep issues: Change the framing
That thing where you lie in bed tossing and turning and worrying about how little sleep you are getting? That’s bad. Your body starts to associate your bed with worrying and insomnia. Instead of your bed being a safe-haven, it becomes a place of stress. The more you do this, the stronger that link becomes, and the harder it becomes to fall asleep. You might be tired, but the second you climb between the sheets your brain prepares itself for insomnia.
Here’s how to change that:
- If you can’t sleep, get up. There’s no point in lying down in bed if you aren’t sleeping. If you go to bed and don’t fall asleep within about ten minutes… get back up. Do something productive. If you start to feel sleepy, you can return to bed.
- Don’t think about how tired you are going to be the next day. Instead, remind yourself that a bad night isn’t going to kill you. If you need that sleep, you will fall asleep. If you can’t sleep, worrying about it isn’t going to help.
- Change your bedroom around. Break the link between your bed and the worry of a broken night. Get new bedding if you can afford it. Change the smells in the room, by adding a lavender candle or some essential oils.
- Stop doing anything in bed that isn’t sleep. Don’t read, don’t play with your phone, don’t use your laptop. You want to create an unbreakable association between your bed and sleep.
Fix your sleep issues: Establish a sleep routine
Your body is basically a clock. It works best when things happen on a schedule. This is why routines are so important.
In order to let your body know when it should start to relax and feel sleepy, you should establish a sleep routine. That means you go to bed and get up at the same time every day. Even at weekends. Especially at weekends.
Life, of course, is more complicated than this. But if you can manage one month of going to bed and getting up at the same time every day, you’ll establish enough of a routine that you can afford the occasional late night or lie in. The key word there is ‘occasional’. If you find your routine starts to slip, re-commit to another 30 days.
To help your body relax, a ‘wind down’ routine is a good idea. About an hour before it’s time to go to bed, try the following:
- Switch off screens. TV screens, smartphone screens, computer screens all give off light that makes your body think it’s still daytime and stops melatonin from being released.
- Have a relaxing bath or shower. Try lavender bubble bath – lavender is known for helping you sleep, and a strong smell at bedtime will become associated with sleeping.
- Dim the lights. I like to leave just a lamp on after 9.30pm.
- Read a ‘gentle’ book. I like to read non-fiction books in the evening. Fiction often engages me too much – if it’s a page-turner, I end up staying up half the night to finish it!
The actual details of this routine are up to you. Try a gentle yoga routine. Rub your feet with aromatherapy oils. Go for an evening stroll. Drink a cup of horlix. Whatever you choose, the key is to do the same things each evening, so that your body knows it’s time to sleep.
Again, this can feel inflexible. Commit to it for at least 30 days, so that it becomes a routine. Then you can adjust your routine to work with the rest of your life.
You will want to avoid anything too energetic. Bedtime is not a good time to do a HIIT workout, or start a really engaging and demanding project.
I’ve written an entire post about the importance of a consistent sleep schedule and how to fix it if yours is a tad chaotic!
Fix your sleep issues: Get rid of ‘sleep destroyers’
Caffeine and sleep
When I wasn’t sleeping I used to reach for coffee. Caffeine seems like a great solution to a broken night of sleep – it wakes us up enough to get through the day, right?
When I got serious about trying to fix my sleep issues, I signed up for Sleepio. One of the things they asked me to do was give up caffeine.
I am not going to lie. It was HARD. I had headaches. And, I really missed tea.
But I slept a lot better.
After a few days, the headaches died away and I stopped feeling like I was the walking dead. I started to fall asleep almost as soon as I got into bed. I was impressed!
Later, I started to drink caffeine again and I realised that if I drank tea or coffee after about 10am, it would affect my sleep that night. These days I have a cup of tea first thing in the morning, but then switch to decaf and herbal teas later in the day. Every now and then I treat myself to a ‘real’ coffee – but it is just that. A treat.
Alcohol and sleep
Caffeine is a well-known sleep destroyer. Another one is alcohol. I’ve never been a big drinker – I’ll have a couple of beers maybe once a month or so. As such, this wasn’t a big contributor to my sleep issues. However, if you regularly use an alcoholic drink to wind down and relax in the evening, you’ll want to rethink. Alcohol does help you fall asleep quicker – but it also wakes you up early, and lowers the quality of your sleep so you feel less rested.
Another chemical that affects your sleep is nicotine. Nicotine is a stimulant, which means it wakes you up. I don’t have personal experience of smoking, but if anyone has successfully given up or cut back, please do post about your experience in the comments!
Medications and sleep
Some medications also affect sleep. These include antihistamines, and some prescription medication such as anti-depressants. If you think medication is contributing to your sleep issues, please talk to your health care provider. They might be able to tweak your dosage, or suggest an alternative.
Antihistamines can make you sleepy, but you increase your tolerance quickly. They can also have side-effects such as making you groggy during the day. I take anti-histamines to deal with hay fever season, and it always makes me feel more tired during the day. It isn’t a great solution to insomnia because of this.
Fix your sleep issues: Introduce things that are good for sleep
In the same way that you want to avoid things like alcohol, caffeine and bright lights before bed, you’ll also want to introduce things that are well know to help you relax, wind down and fall asleep.
A few suggestions:
- Drink sleepy tea. There are so many wonderful herbal teas that can help induce drowsiness. A cup of chamomile tea might be just what you need before bed.
- Eat more magnesium (or take a supplement). Magnesium supports deep, restful sleep, and magnesium deficiency has been linked with insomnia. Good sources of magnesium include dark leafy greens, sunflower and sesame seeds, legumes and dairy products.
- Use lavender oil on your pillow. The scent of lavender has long been linked with restful sleep. You can get lavender oil to put on your pillow, lavender candles to burn before bed, and lavender pot pouri to keep by your bed.
- Upgrade your mattress, pillows or blankets. Old, saggy or unsupportive bedding can contribute to poor sleep. If you have allergies, look for hypoallergenic materials. I won’t cover the myriad of options out there, but you can get pillows and mattresses designed for your sleeping style, body type and climate.
Does cinnamon help you sleep?
Since my site is called Cinnamon Sunrise, I thought I had better include a paragraph about cinnamon!
The short answer is that there is no evidence that cinnamon can improve sleep. It is, however, a powerful anti-inflammatory, reduces the risk of heart disease, prevents blood sugar spikes, and may help prevent Alzheimers (further research is needed).
So feel free to add cinnamon to your warm milk before bedtime. It’s definitely doing you some good, even if it isn’t helping you sleep!
How have you tackled your sleep issues?
The things above worked for me. But I would really love to know what has worked for you. Did lavender essential oil end up being the thing that worked? Have you ever tried the ice bath method? Do you do bedtime yoga? Let me know in the comments!
What a brilliant post – I struggle with sleep a lot (admittedly one of my sleep disorders is called “kids”) and I will definitely be trying some of your tips. Thank you!
Yes, kids definitely make things harder! I will admit, the weekend I spent my friend and her newborn, I was definitely not well-rested!
Sleep is so important. I get depressed if I don’t get a solid 8-9 hours on a regular basis, and a few months ago I was really struggling. The biggest thing that helped me was turning the temperature down in my house overnight! Lack of sleep is probably my biggest fear about the arrival of my baby in a couple months!
Oooh, turning the heat down is a good one. I find it hard to sleep with the window closed, I like a bit of breeze.
All I can say regarding the baby is ‘good luck’! I stayed with my friend and her newborn for a weekend, and it was quite hard ^^; Just try and make it a priority to get naps when you can!?
I struggle with sleep and never even considered a ‘bed time routine’ for myself… even though it’s a big focus for my child! Thanks for the tips, going to give them a go! X
It’s funny how the things parents do for their children are so often the exact things we should do for ourselves!
Great post! I don’t sleep well and I generally wake up every 3 or 4 hours. It helped me to think of it as polyphasic sleep and not to fight it. I’m woken up by hot flushes because I am at that age so no amount of good sleep hygiene will fix it but all your advice has helped rather than hindered.
It turned out that my years of sleepless nights was due to perimenopause. I hadn’t realised it most often starts in you late 40’s. Now on HRT sleep isn’t a problem. Zzzzz x
I’ve struggled drifting off to sleep recently so will definitely give these tips a go.
Mmm caffeine, I’m so broken now, it makes moi tired now, but 20 minutes down the road, it kicks moi up, I think they’re called caffeine naps, and napping doesn’t help your long slumber either.
Naps are a double edge sword, what to do???
I leave the choice in your pocket, to choose???